So we've hit the halfway point for our short time in Rwanda. 5 weeks from today I'll be back in Dublin. I'm not gonna lie, I'm really excited about that prospect. I've been scouring websites for internships and such for once I'm back in Dublin...it's a small world, but I'm hoping I just might get lucky.
BUT I am trying to enjoy the last month here. I know it's gonna go quickly, so I don't need to wish for that or anticipate the passage of time. In the last week, I was hitting a slump. I was annoyed at all the little things that I've become so used to, I'm typically pretty good at ignoring. It's the old laundry list of complaints really: stares, "muzungu" calls and whisperings, the lack of certainty with things (is this bus that i'm on, which has always gone to the same place, not going to today? will the market be open if i trek out there?) These may sound like odd or unrealistic concerns, but they're all borne from experience...
Sometimes, the energy it takes to glaze over all these things is just more than you have. The temptation becomes too much, the temptation to stay in your bed, under your net, and with your brain happily lost in whatever TV show you're addicted to at the time. (It takes dedication to go through that many seasons of True Blood or Gossip Girl or the Office! not for the faint of heart!)
It doesn't help that the initial burst of excitement from getting some "real" research done has worn off, my initiatives to get more interviews or do some focus groups have stagnated. My fairly competitive self is also seeing the work of my classmates and the great strides being made and getting grumpy. I think I'm also lost because usually I know the steps I could be/should be taking to make things better. Where I should be looking, whom I should be contacting....but at the moment, I don't. I feel like I've exhausted my resources (which are limited as it is) and not sure how to expand out w/o diluting my work or feeling like I'm doing interviews just to be having them. In other news, how many times can one bug a ministry into speaking with them??
I guess I'll bury myself in reading this week, cause that'll help my field report (that's due at the end of all this) and see if that doesn't lead me on to somewhere new or something new to ask someone I've already bothered. (insert Potter Puppet Pals "BotherbotherBotherbotherBother")
On a brighter note, it does seem that whenever I hit a low point, I have an experience or meet someone that brings me back up. Yesterday, I had a lovely burrito lunch and attempted to go to Kimironko (my favorite market because of all the exciting veg & herbs that aren't present elsewhere). Unfortunately, it was closed...i couldn't believe it til I walked up to the locked gate, because I've never seen it closed before and have gone on Sunday afternoons often. No discernible reason why, though I suspect it might have to do with the grenade attack on Friday. It happened in Nyabugogo and it was the first time (that I'm aware of) where people were actually killed, 2 ...and another 30+ injured.
Obviously, I'm well & fine, and my mild annoyance at the market closure is nothing to the pain of people that were there. I honestly have no idea what this means for Rwanda and the DRC and what kind of mess the two will get into. I can only hope for peace and an end to the use of lives of innocents to make a point.
Wow, so not great at bringing things to a happier note...I got sidetracked, but my original purpose was to explain how pleasant the interactions at my nearby market had been. How unstressful, smiley, appreciative the experience had been yesterday afternoon. The mama's were nice and in awe of the kinyarwanda, as always, but it took a tone of appreciation instead of bizarre curiosity or mockery, which is always preferable. Long story short, I basked in those interactions on my short, cool walk home and enjoyed the great sunset from our garden (which i must post pictures of)...a scene I never get sick of, even if it happens every day. At least there's always something to look forward to!
Monday, July 29, 2013
Thursday, July 11, 2013
how's Suri's burnbook relates to Rwanda
in keeping with my unintentional theme of blogging about other blogs, today's post is (somewhat) inspired by http://surisburnbook.tumblr.com
it's funny how i always know the most about Hollywood gossip when I'm the furthest from it, in every sense of the word. when you have so much time, it's a lot easier to justify spending inordinate amounts of it looking at brainless, but amusing stuff. how else can you possibly explain going through not 1, not 2, but 26 pages of this damn tumblr yesterday?? Yes, I impressed even myself!
If you're not familiar with it, it's a tumblr with posts about celebrities and their kids, in particular, the Royal baby (which isn't even born yet), Blue Ivy (child of Beyonce & Jay Z), the Beckham kids and the Jolie-Pitt pack, as told by TomKat's Suri Cruise. It's pretty funny imagining an angry 7 year old with scathing commentary primarily about how much better/more fashionable she is than other celebrity kids. While that all seems about the furthest thing from Rwanda and the kids here as can be imagined, it wasn't the ridiculousness of their outfits, toys, etc. that struck me.
What was striking was the number of times the Dads were pictured with their respective children...granted the majority were still the kids with their mothers, but frequently both parents, or just the father is pictured. Accepting how un-gender equal even American & European societies are, I was struck by how seldom I see this same picture in Rwandan society. I see it so rarely that I'm absolutely aghast at the site of just a father with his child. I wonder what has happened to the mother...I usually assume dead or ran off, which is terrible. I acknowledge that that's a gross oversimplification and assumption, but the rarity of the situation lends itself to the more outlandish of ideas. The burden of childcare here is so firmly fixed upon mothers that even if the father were to be sitting at home doing nothing, and the mother had a full day of field labor, the likelihood that the child would NOT be strapped to the mama's back is next to none. Past the pregnancy and even accepting the nursing stages, there's no biological reason why the mother has to be taking care of the child, and yet, traditions and society deem that it must be so.
This all ties in very easily with the number of times I shock Rwandans by telling them I have no kids. How could I, at my ripe, old age, continue to be without? Probably something wrong with me! Yes, in fact there is, I have these quirky ideas about becoming educated and making a career for myself before beginning that whole process. I understand that this is also a societal notion, my society has led me one way while their's has led them another. BUT why is it then, whenever girls are given the option for later marriage and more education, they more than often than not, will take that option?
I was told by a well-educated colleague of a friend's that I should do it now, because I can do all the educating myself and job acquisition later, after I have children...but how long after? Months, years, decades? Needless to say, I wasn't exactly persuaded by that option... so in the meantime I'll just quell all these maternal instincts with Hollywood surrogates.
it's funny how i always know the most about Hollywood gossip when I'm the furthest from it, in every sense of the word. when you have so much time, it's a lot easier to justify spending inordinate amounts of it looking at brainless, but amusing stuff. how else can you possibly explain going through not 1, not 2, but 26 pages of this damn tumblr yesterday?? Yes, I impressed even myself!
If you're not familiar with it, it's a tumblr with posts about celebrities and their kids, in particular, the Royal baby (which isn't even born yet), Blue Ivy (child of Beyonce & Jay Z), the Beckham kids and the Jolie-Pitt pack, as told by TomKat's Suri Cruise. It's pretty funny imagining an angry 7 year old with scathing commentary primarily about how much better/more fashionable she is than other celebrity kids. While that all seems about the furthest thing from Rwanda and the kids here as can be imagined, it wasn't the ridiculousness of their outfits, toys, etc. that struck me.
What was striking was the number of times the Dads were pictured with their respective children...granted the majority were still the kids with their mothers, but frequently both parents, or just the father is pictured. Accepting how un-gender equal even American & European societies are, I was struck by how seldom I see this same picture in Rwandan society. I see it so rarely that I'm absolutely aghast at the site of just a father with his child. I wonder what has happened to the mother...I usually assume dead or ran off, which is terrible. I acknowledge that that's a gross oversimplification and assumption, but the rarity of the situation lends itself to the more outlandish of ideas. The burden of childcare here is so firmly fixed upon mothers that even if the father were to be sitting at home doing nothing, and the mother had a full day of field labor, the likelihood that the child would NOT be strapped to the mama's back is next to none. Past the pregnancy and even accepting the nursing stages, there's no biological reason why the mother has to be taking care of the child, and yet, traditions and society deem that it must be so.
This all ties in very easily with the number of times I shock Rwandans by telling them I have no kids. How could I, at my ripe, old age, continue to be without? Probably something wrong with me! Yes, in fact there is, I have these quirky ideas about becoming educated and making a career for myself before beginning that whole process. I understand that this is also a societal notion, my society has led me one way while their's has led them another. BUT why is it then, whenever girls are given the option for later marriage and more education, they more than often than not, will take that option?
I was told by a well-educated colleague of a friend's that I should do it now, because I can do all the educating myself and job acquisition later, after I have children...but how long after? Months, years, decades? Needless to say, I wasn't exactly persuaded by that option... so in the meantime I'll just quell all these maternal instincts with Hollywood surrogates.
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
"The Field" and other cleverness
So, if you haven't already, and if you're curious, you should happen over to the site http://stuffexpataidworkerslike.com/ because it's hilarious and very often, understands my life in a way I can't even yet. Particularly amusing is # 122 "Letter from an Unemployed Overachiever."
I'm sure you can imagine why that one resonates with a 20-something in the midst of a Masters degree with blind hope a job/career will be at the other end of it. HOPEFULLY a job that doesn't involve any sort of apron, order pad, or cash register. Though I am loathe to let all those years of good coffee drink-making go to waste!
Somehow in the midst of my work this time around in Rwanda, I feel more akin to the EAW than I did as a Peace Corps volunteer. I go to my office in the capital city, retreat to the Expat Coffee Shop when our internet's down; I enjoy my hot showers and electricity and occasionally even get driven around in the classic white NGO SUV...but there are still some things that remain elusive, among them, working in "the field."
It's a magical place where your research gets done, where you have purpose and a job to do! You're talking to your focus groups, conducting your interviews and in general, being EAW awesome. You travel out to remote villages and sit under a tree and discuss development! You solve poverty and public health issues and you educate all the youths! I have done a bit of research assisting here and been in on some focus groups, but most of my work will remain here in Kigali. I'll be talking with some ministries, with the partner organizations and maybe conducting some focus groups with the members of the members of my member organization. (There was no way to put member in there anymore, trust me, I tried) So in short, the "field," will remain elusive to me. Which is why I've decided just to open a bar here in Kigali, called "The Field" where everyone can go and be awesome.
I can be talking to my organization, "What are you doing today, Rachel?" "Oh, just going out to the field" They'll never suspect a thing!
It might be some time before I can get together the capital to make this dream a reality. Really, it's all part of my development learning. It's a lesson in the access to credit difficulties for women....But, I will someday open my awesome bar and I can go to "the field" anytime I want!
I'm sure you can imagine why that one resonates with a 20-something in the midst of a Masters degree with blind hope a job/career will be at the other end of it. HOPEFULLY a job that doesn't involve any sort of apron, order pad, or cash register. Though I am loathe to let all those years of good coffee drink-making go to waste!
Somehow in the midst of my work this time around in Rwanda, I feel more akin to the EAW than I did as a Peace Corps volunteer. I go to my office in the capital city, retreat to the Expat Coffee Shop when our internet's down; I enjoy my hot showers and electricity and occasionally even get driven around in the classic white NGO SUV...but there are still some things that remain elusive, among them, working in "the field."
It's a magical place where your research gets done, where you have purpose and a job to do! You're talking to your focus groups, conducting your interviews and in general, being EAW awesome. You travel out to remote villages and sit under a tree and discuss development! You solve poverty and public health issues and you educate all the youths! I have done a bit of research assisting here and been in on some focus groups, but most of my work will remain here in Kigali. I'll be talking with some ministries, with the partner organizations and maybe conducting some focus groups with the members of the members of my member organization. (There was no way to put member in there anymore, trust me, I tried) So in short, the "field," will remain elusive to me. Which is why I've decided just to open a bar here in Kigali, called "The Field" where everyone can go and be awesome.
I can be talking to my organization, "What are you doing today, Rachel?" "Oh, just going out to the field" They'll never suspect a thing!
It might be some time before I can get together the capital to make this dream a reality. Really, it's all part of my development learning. It's a lesson in the access to credit difficulties for women....But, I will someday open my awesome bar and I can go to "the field" anytime I want!
Tuesday, July 2, 2013
Week 2-On some of my actual work, but mostly about market mama's
So begins another exciting week as Rachel Vannice- Int'l. Development Intern by day...lazy book reading bum by night! I know you were holding your breath for the next thrilling installment and here it is! In today's episode: How to navigate Rwandan gov't. policies....How few days can you actually work and still have it count as 'a week'...and What to sing when you're prompted in the market..
This past week, I had the great opportunity to sit in on some focus groups being held by my organization to ascertain the conditions in which civil society organizations (CSOs) work here in Rwanda [though the study will comprise of 4 different countries in Afrca & S. America]. It was a great opportunity to meet some of the leaders of the organizations that I'll be in touch with soon to conduct my own research on social policies and gender issues in Rwanda. It was also a fascinating exercise in candor from a place where this is not terribly commonplace. Though it's only my humble observation and opinion, Rwandans are not very open or forthcoming with their feelings or opinions...especially not about anything political. And call me a cynic, but even when they are, the tendency to tow the company line and extol the virtues of the current government is pervasive. I have had interesting discussions (primarily with my former LCFs who are well-versed in the out-spoken & questioning ways of Americans) about our willingness and eagerness to comment on the political situation in America, usually quite critically. They've been shocked when I explain how anyone can say "Obama sucks" at anytime with complete impunity.
While the organizational leaders were not necessarily critical of the government, they were very forthcoming in the struggles their organizations had faced. It was nice too, to see the ways in which they had used the system to work their way out of their difficult situations. I think it was most interesting for me because we so often just try to change the system as opposed to using it to our advantage.
Speaking of just such a principle is the wonderful fact that this week only consists of two true working days owing to the benefits of not one, but TWO national holidays in Rwanda! Falling on Monday and Thursday and throwing in Friday just to even things out, I could not be more excited for a 4 day weekend that is likely to include a trip over to Kibuye on Lake Kivu AND some solid brochettes that are the closest thing I can get to an American 4th of July bbq. I feel like I haven't really had a proper 4th of July since leaving Boston but will attempt to keep up the spirit this week by splurging on a watermelon at the market and making some solid ramen cole slaw.
I've already been spoiled by a trip to Kimironko (the most magical of Rwandan markets) where I found lettuce, spinach, cilantro and cucumbers, which I've already used to make salsa (my personal favorite) and plan some epic salads (which I always miss most out of America).
It doesn't hurt that in the meantime, I make quite a few friends in the market! Kinyarwanda (while not the most globally useful language) has served me well here... I can annoy my friends with all the talk of how cheaply I can obtain any daily necessity, create disturbances at public events by singing along to Rwandan pop music AND get serious discounts on produce. By explaining to the women in the market that I've farmed a bit here and used a hoe, they decided that we were abagenzi or co-workers. I have no problem at all with that description, especially if it means cheaper bananas! But I really do love to connect with the people (primarily women) in the market and show them that we abazungus are genuinely interested in their culture and language. You never know where that conversation can lead you, such as a delightful linguistic exchange where a women held my hand and sang to me in kinyarwanda and then ask me to sing with her. After lamenting that I didn't know the song, she asked me to sing one in English...as you can imagine, at that moment, every song I've ever known flew out of my head...save one. So began, my first Rwandan market acapella rendition of "American Pie." While I'm not in the Peace Corps anymore, I'm obviously still incidentally fulfilling the goals of cultural exchange. Maybe next time we can get a round going!
This past week, I had the great opportunity to sit in on some focus groups being held by my organization to ascertain the conditions in which civil society organizations (CSOs) work here in Rwanda [though the study will comprise of 4 different countries in Afrca & S. America]. It was a great opportunity to meet some of the leaders of the organizations that I'll be in touch with soon to conduct my own research on social policies and gender issues in Rwanda. It was also a fascinating exercise in candor from a place where this is not terribly commonplace. Though it's only my humble observation and opinion, Rwandans are not very open or forthcoming with their feelings or opinions...especially not about anything political. And call me a cynic, but even when they are, the tendency to tow the company line and extol the virtues of the current government is pervasive. I have had interesting discussions (primarily with my former LCFs who are well-versed in the out-spoken & questioning ways of Americans) about our willingness and eagerness to comment on the political situation in America, usually quite critically. They've been shocked when I explain how anyone can say "Obama sucks" at anytime with complete impunity.
While the organizational leaders were not necessarily critical of the government, they were very forthcoming in the struggles their organizations had faced. It was nice too, to see the ways in which they had used the system to work their way out of their difficult situations. I think it was most interesting for me because we so often just try to change the system as opposed to using it to our advantage.
Speaking of just such a principle is the wonderful fact that this week only consists of two true working days owing to the benefits of not one, but TWO national holidays in Rwanda! Falling on Monday and Thursday and throwing in Friday just to even things out, I could not be more excited for a 4 day weekend that is likely to include a trip over to Kibuye on Lake Kivu AND some solid brochettes that are the closest thing I can get to an American 4th of July bbq. I feel like I haven't really had a proper 4th of July since leaving Boston but will attempt to keep up the spirit this week by splurging on a watermelon at the market and making some solid ramen cole slaw.
I've already been spoiled by a trip to Kimironko (the most magical of Rwandan markets) where I found lettuce, spinach, cilantro and cucumbers, which I've already used to make salsa (my personal favorite) and plan some epic salads (which I always miss most out of America).
It doesn't hurt that in the meantime, I make quite a few friends in the market! Kinyarwanda (while not the most globally useful language) has served me well here... I can annoy my friends with all the talk of how cheaply I can obtain any daily necessity, create disturbances at public events by singing along to Rwandan pop music AND get serious discounts on produce. By explaining to the women in the market that I've farmed a bit here and used a hoe, they decided that we were abagenzi or co-workers. I have no problem at all with that description, especially if it means cheaper bananas! But I really do love to connect with the people (primarily women) in the market and show them that we abazungus are genuinely interested in their culture and language. You never know where that conversation can lead you, such as a delightful linguistic exchange where a women held my hand and sang to me in kinyarwanda and then ask me to sing with her. After lamenting that I didn't know the song, she asked me to sing one in English...as you can imagine, at that moment, every song I've ever known flew out of my head...save one. So began, my first Rwandan market acapella rendition of "American Pie." While I'm not in the Peace Corps anymore, I'm obviously still incidentally fulfilling the goals of cultural exchange. Maybe next time we can get a round going!
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